Col. Gentleman's list of five things mrdankelly's son does that freak him out.

Remarkably, poop and pee don't bother me.

1. Constant stream of drool occasionally alights on mrdankelly's hand while he carries his son. Reminder of similar dripping sputum scenes in Alien

2. While in backwards harness, son unmindfully reaches up and tweaks mrdankelly's nipples (mrdankelly is wearing a ( Read more... )

Col. Gentleman's list of five things mrdankelly never knew until he got a LiveJournal ( Read more... )

Haven't done one of these in a while...

Col. Gentleman's List of the Five Coolest-Looking White People in History (Subject to Change)

1. Samuel Beckett


( Read more... )

Colonel Gentleman's List of the Five Biggest Douchebags mrdankelly Witnessed at Various Rock 'n Roll Shows (And I Do Hope You're Reading This)

* The "perfect spot" seekers at the Mogwai show at the Logan Square Auditorium last year* The 6'6, 230-pound, long scraggy haired, constantly high, smiling fuckwit at the Andrew Bird and His Bowl of Fire show at the ( Read more... )

Colonel Gentleman's List of the Five Longest and Possibly Most Pretentious Song Titles on mrdankelly's iTunes (Points Added for Lowercase Caps in Title ( Read more... )

Col. Gentleman's List of Five Movies mrdankelly Saw Only Once and Refuses to See Again for Various Reasons

1. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer-I saw Henry with semibold and friend named Darrin at the Music Box Theatre in Wrigleyville. I can't recall a time when I left a movie feeling like the world was a worthless ball of shit spinning in an uncaring universe. ( Read more... )

Col. Gentleman's List of Five Historical People and Situations He'd Rather Be Experiencing Right at This Moment ( Read more... )

Colonel Gentleman's List of Five Obscure Martial Arts mrdankelly Has Never Heard of Until Now

* Nguni stick fighting
* Indian Kalarippayattu
* Laotian Ling Lom
* Swedish Glima
* American Jailhouse Rock

Colonel Gentleman's List of Five of mrdankelly's Favorite Mysteries

* The Voynich Manuscript
* Whatever happened to Ambrose Bierce
* Whatever happened to Béla Kiss
* Francis X. Leavy's handprint
* Whatever happened to Beat poet Lew Welch. By the way. He came up with Raid's "Kills Bugs Dead" slogan.

Colonel Gentleman's List of Five Ways mrdankelly Finds Subjects to Write About ( Read more... )